Female Super Powers that are not inborn
Female comic book super heroes have some pretty great powers such as being able to control the weather, telekinesis which is the power to move objects with just her mind, and even matter phasing which is the power to move through solid matter like walls.
But I teach women super powers which are quite different from these. The super powers I teach women endow them with a Teflon™ coating that will helps them shed the meanness and criticism of others as it slides off their back and into the garbage pail where it belongs. You can think of these woman super powers as “skills” that can be learned and once you master them, you become nearly
invincible and impervious to the barbs and petty rejections and games played by others who wish to hurt or harm you. These woman super powers give a woman a profound sense of security which in turns shapes her mental, emotional and and even physical well-being.

Here’s how it positively impacts her life:

1. Improved Self-Esteem and Confidence:

When a woman practices self-love, she learns to value herself for who she is rather than seeking validation from external sources. This boosts her self- esteem, helping her feel more secure and confident in her choices, relationships, and appearance.
2. Healthier Boundaries: Self-love empowers a woman to set boundaries that protect her time, energy, and emotions. She’s better able to say “no” to things that drain her and “yes” to what truly benefits her, leading to healthier, more balanced relationships.

3. Increased Resilience:

With self-love, she builds inner strength and resilience. Challenges, failures, and setbacks become easier to navigate because she sees them as opportunities for growth rather than personal flaws.

4. More Authentic Relationships: When a woman values herself, she’s less likely to settle for relationships that don’t honor her worth. This means she’s more likely to attract people who respect,value, and support her, leading to deeper, more fulfilling connections.

5. Greater Emotional Stability:

Self-love promotes emotional balance. By recognizing her own needs and taking care of herself, she becomes less reactive to external pressures, leading to greateremotional control and peace.
6. Enhanced Self-Care: A woman who loves herself prioritizes her health and well-being, engaging in habits that nourish her mind, body, and soul.

This could mean regular exercise, mindful eating, setting aside time for relaxation, or simply allowing herself to rest when she needs it.

7. Authentic Joy and Fulfillment:

Self-love often leads to a clearer sense of purpose and passion. A woman who values herself seeks what genuinely brings her joy and fulfillment, rather than what society, family, or peers expect of her.

8. Personal Growth and Self-Discovery:

Practicing self-love encourages a woman to explore and embrace her true self. She becomes open to discovering her strengths, weaknesses, dreams, and aspirations, allowing her to evolve in ways that are deeply meaningful.
Learning how to practice self-love lays the foundation for a life where a woman feels empowered, content, and genuinely fulfilled. It’s the basis for a compassionate, joyful, and resilient life where she
can thrive.
I came to my discovery of these super powers at the age of 35 when I realized just how little self-esteem I possessed. I grew up in an environment where I was almost never praised for my sense of humour or my intellect or even validated as a good person.

This instilled in me a terrible sense of self-
loathing which translated into highly dysfunctional behaviour. I became extremely self-destructive and spent years trying to literally annihilate myself by taking multiple drug overdoses.So, I embarked on a
journey to see if I could improve my self-esteem and began to read self-help books. At one point, I decided that I would learn how to make cinnamon buns and spent an entire summer baking one batch of cinnamon buns after the other. My poor children were so sick of eating cinnamon buns by the end of August but I had proven to myself that I could make the best cinnamon buns in my neighbourhood and that gave my self-esteem a real boost but I soon discovered that self-esteem was only the tip of the iceberg.
Over time, I learned that our self-esteem is something that we grow inside ourselves with the help of our families and peer relationships.

Going on the self-esteem journey taught me a lot about the need for a woman to embrace the concept of self-love as a genuine female super power.
The need for self-love is fundamental to living a balanced, fulfilled life, especially in a world that often places high demands on people’s time, energy, and sense of self-worth.

Self-love serves as a grounding force, helping individuals navigate life’s complexities with resilience, joy, and authenticity.
These are the ways self-love helps a woman and why it is essential for every women to incorporate itinto her life:

1. Self-love Counters External Pressures and Expectations:

Society often imposes unrealistic standards, especially on women, related to beauty, success, relationships, and self-sacrifice. Self- love allows a woman to resist these pressures and expectations by prioritizing her inner worth over external validation. This way, she shapes her identity based on what genuinely matters to her, not on
what others expect
Self-love is a powerful antidote to the pressures and expectations imposed by society, family, peers, and media.

For many, these external influences can shape behavior, self-image, and life choices,
often leading to stress, insecurity, and dissatisfaction. Practicing self-love empowers a person, especially women who may face unique societal expectations, to reclaim control over her own narrative and live authentically.

Here’s how self-love counters these external pressures andexpectations:

1. Reduces the Need for Validation

Society often teaches people, especially women, to seek approval for their appearance, behavior, and achievements. Self-love reduces the need for this validation by fostering inner confidence and selfacceptance. When a woman values her own opinions and embraces her worth, she becomes less influenced by others' judgments, making it easier to resist the urge to conform to external expectations.

2. Empowers Authenticity Over Conformity

Self-love encourages a woman to embrace her individuality and live according to her own values and desires. This empowers her to make choices based on what feels right for her, not on what’s“expected” or “popular.” By valuing herself, she’s less likely to feel pressured to follow trends, fit into
specific roles, or meet standards that don’t align with who she is, whether they relate to appearance,lifestyle, or career.

3. Builds Resilience Against Media Influence

The media often promotes idealized, unrealistic images of beauty, success, and happiness, setting standards that are difficult to attain and often unhealthy. Self-love helps a person see these standards
for what they are: marketing tools rather than true reflections of worth or success. When she loves herself, she can approach media critically, appreciating what resonates with her but filtering out unrealistic expectations. This perspective strengthens her self-esteem and body image.

4. Fosters Assertiveness in Setting Boundaries

External pressures can often manifest as demands on time, energy, and emotional labor, especially in close relationships or work environments. Self-love gives a woman the confidence to set boundaries that protect her well-being.

When she values herself, she’s more assertive in saying “no” to situations or people that drain her or push her beyond her limits, helping her prioritize her own
health, goals, and happiness.

5. Encourages Self-Defined Success

Society frequently equates success with high status, wealth, or traditional achievements, but self- love enables a person to define success on her own terms. Rather than measuring herself by external standards, she can focus on what genuinely fulfills her, whether that’s a meaningful career, nurturing relationships, or personal growth.

By grounding herself in self-love, she’s free to pursue what brings her joy and satisfaction without feeling inadequate or “behind.”

6. Promotes Self-Compassion Over Perfectionism

Many people feel pressured to be “perfect,” whether in their careers, families, or social lives. Self-love promotes self-compassion, allowing a woman to embrace her imperfections and see them as part of her unique identity rather than flaws. This perspective frees her from the pressure to
constantly prove herself, helping her prioritize personal happiness and authenticity over the unattainable goal of perfection.

7. Protects Against Comparison and Envy
Society often fosters a mindset of competition and comparison, leading many to feel that they must“keep up” with others’ achievements or appearances.

Self-love reduces the urge to compare by
cultivating a deep sense of self-worth and gratitude for one’s own path. When a person loves herself,she’s less likely to envy others because she sees her own journey as valuable and unique,recognizing that her worth isn’t diminished by someone else’s success.

8. Builds Courage to Challenge Stereotypes
Self-love provides the strength to reject stereotypes and assumptions. For women, this can mean resisting the pressure to fit into traditional gender roles or expectations about appearance, behavior, and life choices. When a woman loves herself, she’s more likely to challenge stereotypes and
embrace her individuality, choosing her own path and advocating for her right to do so

9. Encourages a Growth Mindset Over Fear of Failure
Society often emphasizes achievement and success, creating a fear of failure. Self-love reframes failure as a learning opportunity rather than a reflection of worth.

When a person values herself, she’s
more willing to take risks, learn from setbacks, and view growth as a continual, rewarding process rather than a rigid ladder to be climbed.

10. Cultivates Inner Peace and Reduces Stress

Self-love provides a buffer against the stress that comes from constantly trying to meet external demands. By grounding herself in her own worth and values, a woman can experience a sense of peace, knowing she’s enough as she is. This calm allows her to face the world’s demands with resilience and clarity, responding to pressures from a place of strength rather than self-doubt or
anxiety.

Practicing self-love ultimately empowers a woman to shape her life around her own goals, values, and sense of fulfillment, freeing her from the constraints of external pressures and expectations. It allows her to stand firm in her identity and choices, leading to a more authentic, joyful, and resilient
life.
2. Self-love Lays the Foundation for Other Healthy Relationships: Loving oneself is crucial for forming and maintaining healthy, balanced relationships.

When a person values herself, she naturally
sets boundaries, communicates her needs, and respects others without losing her sense of self. Self- love helps her recognize unhealthy patterns and avoid relationships that drain or demean her, leading
instead to connections that nourish and uplift.

3. Self-Love Builds Emotional Resilience:

Life is full of challenges and setbacks, and without self- love, a woman might internalize failures as personal flaws.

Self-love provides emotional resilience,
allowing her to see setbacks as learning opportunities rather than reflections of her worth. It helps her to extend kindness to herself, bouncing back from tough situations with greater ease and self- compassion.

4. Self-Love Strengthens Mental Health and Well-Being: Self-love is closely tied to mental health.

People who practice self-love are less likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, and chronic stress, as they have a secure foundation in their own worth and capabilities.

Self-love promotes self-acceptance, reducing tendencies toward self-criticism, guilt, or shame and leading to a more stable,
positive self-image.

5. Self-Love Empowers Personal Growth:

Self-love enables a person to embrace growth and change. When she values herself, she’s more willing to take risks, try new things, and pursue her
goals without the fear of failure or judgment. This creates a positive feedback loop of personal growth, as each accomplishment fuels a greater sense of self-worth and confidence.

6. Self-Love Promotes a Balanced Life:

Self-love encourages balance in all areas of life. It motivates a person to prioritize self-care, manage stress effectively, and make choices that promote long-term well-being rather than immediate gratification.

This balance extends to work, relationships,
health, and personal fulfillment, leading to a more harmonious, sustainable lifestyle.

7. Self-Love Gives Greater Happiness and Contentment:

When a person practices self-love, she’smore likely to find joy and contentment within herself rather than relying on external sources. She becomes less affected by the ups and downs of life, more appreciative of the present, and better
equipped to celebrate her own unique journey. Self-love fosters an inner joy that radiates outward, positively influencing her surroundings and relationships.

8. Self-Love Helps Unlock True Potential:

Self-love allows a woman to see herself as worthy of growth, success, and fulfillment. Without self-love, fear, self-doubt, and feelings of unworthiness can hold her back from achieving her dreams.

But with self-love, she approaches her goals with confidence and clarity, ready to overcome obstacles and unlock her full potential.

9. Self-Love Reduces Burnout and Embraces Self-Care:

In a fast-paced world, many people,
particularly women, are prone to burnout from taking on too many responsibilities without proper self- care. Self-love encourages a healthy practice of self-care, ensuring she regularly checks in with her
needs—physically, mentally, and emotionally.

This helps prevent burnout and keeps her energy balanced and sustainable.
Self-Love is not selfish or self-indulgent. It is a necessity for women who want to live a balances and fulfilled life because it helps her navigate life’s complexities with strength, peace, and genuine happiness.

Through the practice of self-love, a woman becomes her own best ally and is able to
transform her relationship with herself and, in turn, enriching every aspect of her life because self-love is a super power.

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